The Speed-Dial King

Amazing.  Stupid, and amazing.

Cinematic Swiss Cheese

I’m writing this less than ten minutes into watching “Bullet Proof Monk” and, well, wish people would just feel free to make movies with martial arts unencumbered by attempts to have the movie make sense. Evidently, these Buddhist monks somewhere in Tibet guard this amazing scroll that, if read aloud, will give the person who reads it the power to turn the world into a paradise or hell. Right. And I’m supposed to believe that after years of guarding this source of “phenomenal cosmic power” they didn’t figure out that the fate of mankind and life in general would be a whole lot easier is they just destroyed the thing. Of course, for the movie to continue, no one’s allowed to be that smart.

Or “30 Days of Night?” If these guys are so worried about vampires, why don’t they just move closer to the equator? Oh no. Way too easy. The entire town has to stay there and die from hypothermia or by being chewed to death by armies of the fanged and evil semi-dead.

*groan*